I am packing my bags and I am ready to run away.  I can't take this any longer.  I want to run and run away.  I want to see the stars from another place.  I want to know feel the sun on another day.  So here I go again.  It is time.  we have been here long enough spinning wheels and tapping the same rhythms.  I want to go. I am ready to go.  I have done what I can do here.  I tasted all your drugs and fruits.  I have laughed and cried.  The hallway has come to an end and i am ready to enter a new place.  I want to see if I grow wings and learn to fly.  I can't do this anymore.  I am leaving and I am leaving happy.  I just want to dance and dance all night into somewhere new.  So back the fuck off and leave me the fuck alone.  Maybe you were a scaffold and maybe I am not grateful but I realize none of you ever loved me.  So get the fuck out of my way.  I just want to feel the light.  I want to drink the light.  And I want it all alone.  So nevermind you and nevermind me.  I am leaving and I never want to know that I was ever gone.  I am done with this place.  I am diving alone into a pool of dark waters.  Go away!  Go away!  I don't want to hear your voice.  I don't want to see your face.  I want to be blind.  I want to be deaf.  I never want to stop.  I want to jump and jump and jump.  Go away!  I thought that I already told you where I want you to be. 

However, she was to marry.  She was to marry a prince and only a prince.  She was excited by the thought of someone to spend her days with, someone to share her life and love.  But she felt lost, she felt there was no one for her.  All the princes she had encountered seemed more like frogs than princes.  Their conceit and snobbish ways built warts of ugliness on their clean faces.  The princess wanted someone special and beautiful.  She wanted someone soft and sensitive.  Someone happy.

Day in and day out the princess hoped and searched, but she only ever found the reflection of a lonely princess.  Her father saw the torment if loneliness in her eyes and he bought all he could.  He had diamonds from the crystal plains brought in, pearls from the softest seas shipped over, and gave her lace of the finest colors.  Still rivers ran from her eyes and never did those red, red lips blossom into a smile.

Today.

Today was an extremely bright day and the birds were singing more divinely than usual.  As she listened she thought of the upcoming ball.  She took off her gloves, shut her eyes, and pretended she was gracing the floor with some beautiful boy.  She swayed back and forth, and listened hard to the imaginary compliments and jealousies whispered by the invisible on-lookers.  She and imaginary lover giggled at all the awe and they whipped and whirled and became nothing more than a storm of silk and lace.  As she dreamed eyes were watching her she had no idea that a pair of electric green eyes did spy on her privately public dance with their on awe.

A cloud joined the ball as well, dancing in front of the sun, temporarily darkening the sky and all it touched.  The princess startled by the sudden change in light snapped her eyes open.  Out of the corner of her eye a wisp of lavish blonde hair caught her hair.  She twirled around and came face to face with the most beautiful person she had ever encountered.

"Hi!" She gasped startled.

"Hi!" He echoed.

Then there was a moment of awkward silence.  Finally she broke the silence by demanding, "What are you doing here?!"

"I am hiding from my boss," he shyly smiled back.

"Here?" She asked with an arched eyebrow.

"Well, I had to take a lot of turns.  It seemed like a good spot," he still smiled the same smile.

"I guess," the princess knew not what to say next.  She looked down for a second and then he spoke.

What he said at that moment was not important nor remembered.  What is known is they began to talk and talk and talk.  They shared their lives and the stories that had brought them to that place in the garden.  They talked and then they laughed and they repeated until the sun slipped into the hills.  As twilight stretched its body over the sky the princess knew she had to return to the castle and the boy back to the servants' quarters.  The princess started to walk back towards the castle and as she did he called out.

She turned, "What?" she smiled.

He frozen.  He knew nothing to say, so he said, "Nothing."

"Are you sure?"

He just waved good-bye.  She waved back, giggled, and took off running towards the castle.  He watched her fall into the darkening day and then he went back to, too.

When the sun pushed out the black of the night the next morning the princess returned to the same spot hoping to catch a glimpse of that lavish hair or those electric eyes once again.  When she got to "their spot" he was not there.  She decided it was a beautiful day and dancing brought him yesterday.  Could it bring him again?  She danced, eyes closed, and this time her partner had a face.  In her mind she snuggled against him, she felt the warmth of his body as they danced.  She could hear his heartbeat.

"Hi," a voice whispered.

She nearly screamed.  She whirled around and came face to face with the most beautiful person she had ever encountered.  Half of her red mouth curved like a silver moon into a smile and she asked with a flick of her black eyelashes, "Hiding from your boss?" and then let out a nefariously innocent giggle.

He matched her and replied, "Yes," with an innocuously evil grin in his voice.

"Did you get in trouble yesterday?"  She asked with little concern.

"Nope.  Never even noticed I was gone.  Can I ask you something?"

She nodded.

"Why do you wear those gloves?  It is warm out here."

"Oh!"  She let out a blushed laugh and looked down at the gloves.  "They protect my delicate, princess skin."  She pulled the gloves off to expose her simple, carved hands.  She tossed them to the ground and grabbed his rough and chiseled hands.  "Want to dance?"  By the time her mouth had let the word 'dance' escape they were already spinning, spinning faster than the Earth and everything paused as they blended together.  All she could see was him.  He face sculpted from Greek ivory contrasted by his eyes so bright, so lively… so happy.  And long strands of hair that looked like rays of the sun at dawn encompassed all of it like a halo.

As they stopped spinning and laughing the boy told her that she was going to have to teach him how to dance.  She said she would with pleasure.  They began dancing everyday in the same spot.  On occasion she would bring baskets of food and they would break from dancing to have a picnic under the flowers and clouds of the gardens.  They were growing very close.

On one evening they had become so involved in their conversation they failed to notice the sun had dove into the hills splashing the sky with pink and purple, orange and red.  The stars were beginning to come out and watch over the world below.

"Oh no!  It is almost dark," she said hurriedly.  "I have to go or father will be angry."  As she rushed back towards the castle she did not notice she only grabbed one of her gloves and left the other on the ground cold and lonely.

Inside the palace that evening she could no longer contain her joy.  The king of course saw the red smile on her face.  It was a red smile that had gone missing a thousand years.  He inquired about this ancient red smile.  Where was it coming from now?  She left out no detail.  She told her father about the boy and his eyes and his laugh and his lack of dancing skills and how hard he tried.  As her red smile grew so did the king's dismay.  How could his princess be involved with someone as she described?  A gardener of sorts.  The king silenced her voice and with a single sentence broke the 1,000 year red smile.

"You may never see that boy again," the king hissed from parched lips and a bitter mind.

The red smile fell to the floor and she stomped into farther into the ground as she ran out of the room.  She flew up the stairs and flung herself into her room, on to her bed.  She felt into a pool of her tears and as she laid there drowning she wished only for her mother.  The kind face of her mother.  Her mother knew love.  Her mother was love, and she would force the king to understand that love cannot tell the hands of a gardener from the hands of a princess.  It only knows how to connect those hands.

Suddenly there was a soft knock, not from her bedroom, but from her balcony door.  With red eyes she looked up confused and saw the moonlit silhouette of the boy.  The fractured red smile reappeared for a moment as she threw doors opening welcoming him and the night.

"I brought back your glove," he looked into her eyes, held out the glove, and whispered.

"Thank you," she laughed.  "I did not know I had left it.  I guess the other got pretty lonely."

"Well, it no longer has to worry about that," he said.

Then a silence hung between them balanced on their gaze, both looking at one another to fill with emotion to speak.  Finally, she broke down into tears and fell into his arms.  She was clinging to his warmth, his body, his soul.  "I must tell you the tragic truth," she bawled.  She told him the story of her love.  She told him the story of her father.  She spoke so nervously, "I have walked through many meadows and valleys.  Everyday I walk through the garden mazes, and I have seen all sorts of flowers.  Some pretty, some beautiful, but they are just flowers.  They are there to only entertain my eyes, not to flourish in my soul, not to entice all my senses, not to revive my life.  I never stopped and smelled them, or cherished them.  But you, you were a flower I could not pass by.  Your beauty did more than entertain me.  You tempted me.  Your voice was like an ancient song.  When you get close to me your scent was strong, yet so passionate like heaven.  Your skin is soft like silk, almost like a fiery velvet.  And your kisses, I am sure, are like raindrops on my lips, sweet like the finest wine and soft like the smoke of an angel.  Rejuvenating and refreshing with its difference."

He leaned over and kissed her.  It was everything she thought it would be and more.  It left an excitement she could taste on her lips.

"I love too love you," his voice was as soft as zephyrs.  "My love for you is like the Earth's love for the sun.  I worship you, and you help me grow.  But unlike the Earth I am not just stuck in orbit.  I have you.  I have you in my heart and in my arms.  That first day, when I saw you, it was like when the sun rose…"

"DAUGHTER!" The king's voice boomed up the stairs.  He had been worried about her all night and wanted to try to clearly explain why she was no longer allowed to see the boy.  He bellowed once more at her door before pushing it open.

As the door swung open the princess was helping the boy back over the ledge and on to the vines to climb down.

"Jump!" She shouted in a whisper to him.  He flew over the edge, his long hair waving a good-bye.

The king ran towards his daughter and demanded to know who that was and what was going.  She knew that she could never tell the truth so she told him that the boy was apparently obsessed with her and had climbed her balcony.  She had been so scared and the king had come just in time to protect her.  She did not stop to think that the king would send his guards after him, which he did.

"Daughter, do not worry.  I will gather my guards and we will find this man.  You will be protected," he yelled out for his guards and four came rushing in.  The king directed them to protect the balcony and her bedroom door.  They were to stay there until they were told the man was found.

In her worry for the boy she began to softly sob.  Her father thought it was because she was scared of the intruder.  Only if he knew that she scared for the intruder.  The king reassured of her of her safety and rushed out like the storm rushing in.

She sat next to her window.  The guards outside were now being thrashed by the rain.  They looked so silly standing in the rain, and from somewhere in the room she heard a giggle.  She realized it was from her own mouth.  It saddened her to know the boy would also love to laugh at the guards.  They always laughed together.

She looked into the sky.  The clouds had eaten most of the night sky but there was one little star trying so hard to illuminate the dark.  She looked into this star, praying to its softer side.  She begged this little star to hear what she silently screamed.  Please protect the boy.  Please make sure that he is safe.  Please I need his love!  I need him to be surrounded by him forever.  Surrounded by him forever!

She fell asleep at the window that night.  She dreamed of wishes and prayers and hopes and desires.  As the sun gently tapped at the world announcing day her father also tapped at her door.  He walked towards with sympathy and fear in each step.  The boy had not been found in the dark of the night.  He woke her and gave her the news, and though her heart burst with happiness, her face pretended to burst with fear.  The king asked her just to stay in her room all day.  He told her that the servants would be there to wait on her hand and foot until he was found.  She painfully smiled and agreed.

As he left she began to devise a plan.  She needed out.  She needed to be in their spot.  He must be there.  There were a lot of turns to get there.  Could they find him there?  How to get past the guards?

She knew.  She knew how to get by the guards.

She threw the balcony doors open and exclaimed, "He has been found!  He has been found!"

The guards lit up.  That meant they could come in and warm up.  She opened the doors, welcoming them to come in.  As they stepped on to the plush carpet she ran straight out on to the marbled floor of the balcony and jumped right over the cold banister.  Her fall was not long but long enough for the guards to understand they had been lied to.

As they turned to shout she landed.  She felt little pain as her bare feet sunk into the darken mud.  She was out!  She was going to protect him!  The star had heard her above all the voices in the universe.

She ran into the maze.  She ran left and turned right.  She passed the purple flowers and dove under the tree branches.  Out of breath she arrived at their spot. 

He was not there.

She pulled at branches and screamed quietly his name.  She spun and spun and the world paused as she looked with blended tears in her eyes.  Where was he?  Could he have forgotten their spot?  Maybe she had.  Maybe she was too scared to remember.

She was about to turn a corner when she spied a lavish, uncolored flower.  She spun around and came face-to-face with the most beautiful flower she had ever seen.

"Hi!" She gasped.

A breeze blew and made the flower nod as if to say "hi!"  The blossom appeared to dance and raindrops flew from its petals like prisms.  Its beauty tempted her.  She had to lift the bloom to her nose.  The scent was strong, yet so passionate like heaven.

She felt the petals.  They were softer than silk, almost like a fiery velvet.

She smiled and tilted her head as if to closely inspect the flower.

"Are you…" before she could finish the sentence the flower was nodding in the wind.

She lifted the blossom to her lips.  The raindrops ran from the tips of its petals on to her red lips.  It tasted sweet, like the finest wine, and it felt soft like the smoke of angel.  She could taste excitement on her lips as she pulled away.  When she opened her eyes to gaze upon its beauty again she saw that the red had bled from her lips into the petals.  She laughed, and the flower curled its petals as if to ask for another kiss.  She kissed the beautiful blossom again and again and again.  And with each kiss the flower grew redder and redder.  It almost seemed to glow.  He was safe.  The boy safe!

She stepped back with joy and her eyes breathed him in.  She showed that 1,000 year, silver moon, red half smile again and said, "You know, I think I shall give you a new name.  I will be here everyday, dancing and singing to you.  I will tell you everything of everyday and I would like to be able to talk to you.  But in your new form I feel you need a new name."

She paused as she pondered, remembering everything between them.  "I know!  The last thing you ever said to me was, 'That first day, when I saw you, it was like when the sun rose…'  I remember because I so wanted to hear what you were going to say.  'Rose.'  Rose was the last word you ever spoke to me.  Rose.  Rose is what I will call you.  I know it may sound silly but isn't that how we were, Rose?"  She threw her head back and laughed and Rose nodded again in the wind.  And they danced once again, in the wind.

Their dance was cut short by a loud voice proclaiming, "There she is!"  One of the guards had found the princess.

The king came around the corner and grabbed her angrily.  "What are you doing?" He yelled.  She did not speak, and the king began to drag her back towards the castle.  She cried out with pain.  Rose could never let anyone hurt his princess.  He reached out towards them but no longer did he have arms.  As he tried to grab her he grew sharp thorns and lashed out towards the king and guards.  In shock they all jumped back and the princess was freed.  She took off running.  Rose did not want to lose sight of her.  He wanted to protect her always.  He stretched his vines as far as they could go and soon he caught up with her, her running down the path and him down the wall.  Soon the maze ended and he leaped towards the ground and kept on following.  He followed her through the halls and up the stairs.  He went right up into her room.  He climbed all the walls and around the bed posts, through the windows and the mirrors.  He grew all around the room with many twisted, sharp thorns so he could always protect his princess.  She was surrounded by him forever.  Surrounded by him forever!

I am so self-involved that I am so self-unaware so if I ever say anything that could be perceived as knowing something about anything it is probably nothing.  And if I say nothing about anything everyone knows that something is wrong but no one ever knows what that thing is and it could be anything about everything or nothing.  Can't ask me because I am too busy with myself to notice that something may be wrong with me so I go on depressed because everyone wants to know what I don't know nor care to know because I love myself too much to love myself so I full of emptiness because all I want is me to care about something besides myself.  But I can't even hear what I am saying because I am too busy talking with myself and praising everything that I hate about me.  I never even took the time to notice that I cry because i cried so long that long ago I learned to never listen to what I complain about and I go on looking at myself with lust and love wondering how ever did I get to be so lucky to be me.  If I was ever anyone else, I would never want to be someone else, I would be jealous of me because all i ever wanted was to me and I realized the day I opened my tear filled eyes dream do come true.  So I cannot quite understand why all those who concern themselves with those tears in my eyes.  Why should anyone care about me?  I ignore me because I have me to worrry about and everyone should know that out of anyone I am the most important... at least to me.