[Deviant Nation] Sakura's Journal

[Deviant Nation] Sakura's Journal We believe that people who love erotica are more than just faceless members sitting at a computer looking at photos of nameless models. We are a community, a cooperative, a society of people that are more than the dollar amount of their site memberships. Deviant Nation We believe that people who love erotica are more than just faceless members sitting at a computer looking at photos of nameless models. We are a community, a cooperative, a society of people that are more than the dollar amount of their site memberships. We are striving to combine community, subculture, artistic expression and erotica all at once. Deviant Nation satan@deviantnation.com Girls,Pinup,Tattoo,Pierced,Goth,Punk,Rockabilly,emo,Metal,Subcultures yes http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura en-us Copyright 2003-2008 Deviant Nation, Inc. satan@deviantnation.com Sat, 15 Mar 2003 07:00:00 GMT Wed, 03 Dec 2008 19:31:27 GMT 60 DN Logo http://i.deviantnation.com/i/dn-logo-small.png http://deviantnation.com Deviant Nation 76 144 sushi trigger the bloodshed and pictures :D http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/83278 [Deviant Nation] Sakura's Journal sushi trigger the bloodshed and pictures :D Sakura request: if anyone knows of a good black and grey tattoo artist that does jap work doesnt matter what country can they let me no. thankies This is my lunch for today a boy did drop it off at my house last night he made it *girlish giggle* its not as cute as it sounds i ended up txing dirty things to him while in the state mentioned in a  previous journal and this is im trying to sushi my way into your pants. Do you remeber a friend i mentioned in a previous journal who turned up at my door with gifts to cheer me up?? a few eeks ago he stopped talking to me and then when i text him asking what was wrong he said he needed some space from me. turns out i think iv become a little too involved in my shit atm. it hurts to hear stuff like that but its good cos at least now i no iv done it so i can fix it. tomorrow i go see the tattoo artist. was meant to se him last wed but my friend who knows him couldnt go so i chickened out lol heres another current drawing i dont think i posted my groin after my last lasering sesion so now its all healed this is how it now looks no lasering                                                           thrid session my nose currently smells of cheese because of the metal 6mm ring i have through my nose and the rubber bands that are catching whatever it is that i dont want to think about hahaha So tonight am seeing trigger the bloodshed and cryptopsy with my ex and his friends. i really wish i didnt get on with his friends lol this is the last group thing well be doing together and as much as i dont want to go im not giving him that satisfaction because hes already told me no to go!! and said hed buy my ticket cos his brother wants to. like fuck!!! no one fucking tells me what to do!!! so im going and im going to ignore him so it doesnt make the evening shitty for eveyone. iv recently had to block him from everything im on, on the internet its been getting too much the other day he said im the reason my dad left home! that is below the belt if you ask me still trying to figure out dates for ireland to see mr hahaha i may have a small crush on a guy hahah a call him a  superhero. hes cute but i no nothings going to happen but itll be a good week away xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx Blog yes

request: if anyone knows of a good black and grey tattoo artist that does jap work doesnt matter what country can they let me no. thankies

This is my lunch for today a boy did drop it off at my house last night he made it *girlish giggle*

its not as cute as it sounds i ended up txing dirty things to him while in the state mentioned in a previous journal and this is im trying to sushi my way into your pants.

Do you remeber a friend i mentioned in a previous journal who turned up at my door with gifts to cheer me up?? a few eeks ago he stopped talking to me and then when i text him asking what was wrong he said he needed some space from me. turns out i think iv become a little too involved in my shit atm. it hurts to hear stuff like that but its good cos at least now i no iv done it so i can fix it.

tomorrow i go see the tattoo artist. was meant to se him last wed but my friend who knows him couldnt go so i chickened out lol
heres another current drawing

i dont think i posted my groin after my last lasering sesion so now its all healed this is how it now looks
no lasering thrid session

my nose currently smells of cheese because of the metal 6mm ring i have through my nose and the rubber bands that are catching whatever it is that i dont want to think about hahaha

So tonight am seeing trigger the bloodshed and cryptopsy with my ex and his friends. i really wish i didnt get on with his friends lol this is the last group thing well be doing together and as much as i dont want to go im not giving him that satisfaction because hes already told me no to go!! and said hed buy my ticket cos his brother wants to.
like fuck!!!
no one fucking tells me what to do!!!
so im going and im going to ignore him so it doesnt make the evening shitty for eveyone.
iv recently had to block him from everything im on, on the internet its been getting too much the other day he said im the reason my dad left home! that is below the belt if you ask me

still trying to figure out dates for ireland to see mr

hahaha i may have a small crush on a guy hahah a call him a superhero. hes cute but i no nothings going to happen but itll be a good week away

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx]]> Sakura Blog http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/83278/#comments 9 http://rss.deviantnation.com/comments/journal/83278 http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/83278 Tue, 02 Dec 2008 13:32:56 GMT i did got me some hair http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/83198 [Deviant Nation] Sakura's Journal i did got me some hair Sakura heres an update on what my face looks like lately.... absolute fucking shit hahahahthe bags just wont go. my ed hardy glasses came the other day i was excited. they came in a beautiful stitched leather case as well there so beefy. unfortuntatly there also beefy for my face! i think they look like the chucnky blind person glasses we get over here!! bling bling lol i keep telling myself the more i wear them the more i think theyll suit me hahahaha. xxxxx Blog yes heres an update on what my face looks like lately....

absolute fucking shit hahahahthe bags just wont go.

my ed hardy glasses came the other day i was excited. they came in a beautiful stitched leather case as well there so beefy. unfortuntatly there also beefy for my face!

i think they look like the chucnky blind person glasses we get over here!!

bling bling lol

i keep telling myself the more i wear them the more i think theyll suit me hahahaha.

xxxxx]]> Sakura Blog http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/83198/#comments 42 http://rss.deviantnation.com/comments/journal/83198 http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/83198 Mon, 01 Dec 2008 17:38:22 GMT No Subject http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/82999 [Deviant Nation] Sakura's Journal Sakura im having a day in living hell. im so fucking horny and its driving me slightly loopy. like actually its really bad and i ahve done nothing at all at work besides talk to this guy. only twice have i masturbated at work and thats how im going to keep it lol. arrrrrrrrrrrghhhhhhhh omg its so bad its been 10 months since iv had any form of human contact that includes KISSING!! AND HOLDING HANDS!!! its really upsetting to not ahve that kind f closeness for so long and in a few days time its going to reach 11 and in a month its going to be a year were i will have revirginised myself i think i need to quarentene myself So torture garden is coming up yet again iv got my outfit sorted out im having to do it on the cheap cos i cant afford anymore latex and tbh i dont like dancing in latex having sweat run off my legs and back does not ake me feel sexy at all so iv just bought these im hoping there not going to be so big they drown out my boobs im really fucking small lol. this skirt in black and my platform 7 inch buffaloes im officially getting my horn in, this normally happens in summer i must be a late bloomer lol hahahahahah arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh   Blog yes im having a day in living hell. im so fucking horny and its driving me slightly loopy. like actually its really bad and i ahve done nothing at all at work besides talk to this guy.
only twice have i masturbated at work and thats how im going to keep it lol.
arrrrrrrrrrrghhhhhhhh omg its so bad
its been 10 months since iv had any form of human contact that includes KISSING!! AND HOLDING HANDS!!!

its really upsetting to not ahve that kind f closeness for so long and in a few days time its going to reach 11 and in a month its going to be a year were i will have revirginised myself

i think i need to quarentene myself

So torture garden is coming up yet again iv got my outfit sorted out im having to do it on the cheap cos i cant afford anymore latex and tbh i dont like dancing in latex having sweat run off my legs and back does not ake me feel sexy at all so iv just bought these

im hoping there not going to be so big they drown out my boobs im really fucking small lol. this skirt in black

and my platform 7 inch buffaloes

im officially getting my horn in, this normally happens in summer i must be a late bloomer lol

hahahahahah

arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

]]> Sakura Blog http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/82999/#comments 34 http://rss.deviantnation.com/comments/journal/82999 http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/82999 Fri, 28 Nov 2008 16:36:15 GMT i suck http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/82797 [Deviant Nation] Sakura's Journal i suck Sakura this sucks im trying to draw. im trying to get an apprenticeship and with no college art degrees iv taught myself to paint and to copy. now i realise that all sucks so im manically tring to learn how to draw with like a week and i fucking suck at shading. tomorrow i have to go see the guy to ahve my work looked at. :( im shitting a brick. i wish we had an emoticon for that. that would be amazing. Im sitting with my hoody up at work with my fingers frozen and about to go yellow and numb. god bless the reynards disease and for my boss putting a shitty little gas heater in that is doing fuck all unless i sit under the desk. the weekend was shockingly bad. i left half way through carcass to get away from ex early enough. halfway through carcass!!!!!!!!!!! wtf is wrong with me lol glad to be home.....kinda. just got to deal with xmas now. my mum was hinting about going christmas shoping saying if im not doing anything on my day off....i told her i was. i cant think of anything more annoying then spending hours with her not saying anything.i just dont like talking to her its on parr with talking to a digestive biscuit. theres no connection there. i wish i could open up and speak freely but the fact is that i hate being at home and i hate having nothing in common with her. i also depsise my brother whos moving back in, in january. cant believe gwindylyn got her tongue split before me lol!! im so jealous cant wait to get mine done. i notice now how everyone is thinking about getting it done too lol xxxxxxxxxx Blog yes im shitting a brick. i wish we had an emoticon for that. that would be amazing.

Im sitting with my hoody up at work with my fingers frozen and about to go yellow and numb. god bless the reynards disease and for my boss putting a shitty little gas heater in that is doing fuck all unless i sit under the desk.

the weekend was shockingly bad. i left half way through carcass to get away from ex early enough.
halfway through carcass!!!!!!!!!!! wtf is wrong with me lol

glad to be home.....kinda. just got to deal with xmas now. my mum was hinting about going christmas shoping saying if im not doing anything on my day off....i told her i was.
i cant think of anything more annoying then spending hours with her not saying anything.i just dont like talking to her its on parr with talking to a digestive biscuit. theres no connection there.

i wish i could open up and speak freely but the fact is that i hate being at home and i hate having nothing in common with her. i also depsise my brother whos moving back in, in january.

cant believe gwindylyn got her tongue split before me lol!! im so jealous cant wait to get mine done. i notice now how everyone is thinking about getting it done too lol

xxxxxxxxxx
]]> Sakura Blog http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/82797/#comments 30 http://rss.deviantnation.com/comments/journal/82797 http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/82797 Tue, 25 Nov 2008 12:18:23 GMT wispa binge http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/82441 [Deviant Nation] Sakura's Journal wispa binge Sakura Im of the mind right now that cheese and spring onion is on parr with the same nastiness as egg mayonaise when it comes to sandwiches. no quibbling its the truth!!! on my way up to town to get this superb delicacy i found this in a charity shop. just take a closer look at this motif!! rare to find stuff like this iv been eating so shockingly little recently. probably stress from my mother and this coming weekeend im really not looking forward to it  i have however been eating shit like too many wispas lol. i feel so ill Yesterday i met with my model friend on another site because her and her partner have been helping me out. im not going to say anything cos i believe too much in jinxing but it has left me feeling like a have an avenue and some support. shame on mike tho for taking me shopping round some ghetto shops and making me fall in love with everything covered in rhinestones. nikes, gorgeous blue jacket by baby phat and these bad boys i have no idea what im doing for christmas presents lol iv gotta post some out soon like  Kilesa i ahve too many shoes to paint and a portfolio to do huff i constantly feel a little dispondant but thats alright this is a current me. i got some new jewellary recently for my broken fleshhole and the bandana is to keep underwraps the one inch long hair. im a sad mother fucker arnt i??? lol im getting one of these as well as a tongue split when im better and have my hand tattooed xxxxxx Blog yes Im of the mind right now that cheese and spring onion is on parr with the same nastiness as egg mayonaise when it comes to sandwiches.
no quibbling its the truth!!!

on my way up to town to get this superb delicacy i found this in a charity shop. just take a closer look at this motif!! rare to find stuff like this

iv been eating so shockingly little recently. probably stress from my mother and this coming weekeend im really not looking forward to it
i have however been eating shit like too many wispas lol. i feel so ill

Yesterday i met with my model friend on another site because her and her partner have been helping me out. im not going to say anything cos i believe too much in jinxing but it has left me feeling like a have an avenue and some support.
shame on mike tho for taking me shopping round some ghetto shops and making me fall in love with everything covered in rhinestones. nikes, gorgeous blue jacket by baby phat and these bad boys

i have no idea what im doing for christmas presents lol iv gotta post some out soon like Kilesa

i ahve too many shoes to paint and a portfolio to do huff

i constantly feel a little dispondant but thats alright this is a current me. i got some
new jewellary recently for my broken fleshhole and the bandana is to keep underwraps the one inch long hair.

im a sad mother fucker arnt i??? lol

im getting one of these as well as a tongue split when im better and have my hand tattooed

xxxxxx

]]> Sakura Blog http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/82441/#comments 43 http://rss.deviantnation.com/comments/journal/82441 http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/82441 Thu, 20 Nov 2008 14:56:30 GMT it never rains but it pours http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/82066 [Deviant Nation] Sakura's Journal it never rains but it pours Sakura you no how it goes. i have a spot on the middle of my forehead that feels like a small ukranian child is trying to come out. this isnt counting the other myriad of spots and bags that my face is undergoing. i have pigged too many sweets and now i feel quite sick. probably in some defiance of making myself feel like shit because iv stopped smoking. this is how i see myself those balloons represent something i have to let go one was smoking i lapsed and i feel so guilty but it was one day so im glad i didnt make excuses for it to go over a few the other is my ex. i changed my no the other day so he could no longer get in contact with me and send horrible messages and just no my sidekick went and deleted all my contacts off my phone this is why it rains but never pours lol the one thats still unpopped is my job that one is still to go and im in the throes of writing my cv and getting everything sorted so hopefully ill be leaving in january. but ill be careful what i wish for. im still brooding after a  dog im brooding after a change and i ahvnt been on here much or been in alot of peoples journals and i do apologise but im having a bit of a sort through of my life atm and it seems im losing everyone on every level lol like my phone is trying to tell me somehing hahahaha im looking forward to the time when im in a happy place and can start getting modified again xxxx Blog yes
i have a spot on the middle of my forehead that feels like a small ukranian child is trying to come out.
this isnt counting the other myriad of spots and bags that my face is undergoing.

i have pigged too many sweets and now i feel quite sick. probably in some defiance of making myself feel like shit because iv stopped smoking.

this is how i see myself

those balloons represent something i have to let go

one was smoking i lapsed and i feel so guilty but it was one day so im glad i didnt make excuses for it to go over a few

the other is my ex. i changed my no the other day so he could no longer get in contact with me and send horrible messages and just no my sidekick went and deleted all my contacts off my phone this is why it rains but never pours lol

the one thats still unpopped is my job that one is still to go and im in the throes of writing my cv and getting everything sorted so hopefully ill be leaving in january. but ill be careful what i wish for.

im still brooding after a dog

im brooding after a change and i ahvnt been on here much or been in alot of peoples journals and i do apologise but im having a bit of a sort through of my life atm
and it seems im losing everyone on every level lol like my phone is trying to tell me somehing hahahaha

im looking forward to the time when im in a happy place and can start getting modified again
xxxx

]]> Sakura Blog http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/82066/#comments 18 http://rss.deviantnation.com/comments/journal/82066 http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/82066 Sat, 15 Nov 2008 16:02:06 GMT i would like a dog pleeeeasse mooooooooom http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/81541 [Deviant Nation] Sakura's Journal i would like a dog pleeeeasse mooooooooom Sakura i dont understand why everything has to be revolved around being in a relationship. renting/buying a flat/house adopting/rescueing animals the first conversation when you see someone after a long time. Im sorry but for me a relationship is not the be all and end all of life!! i have a ton of other things i want to be doing. i dont like kids i dont get all gooey when i see them so stop throwing your baby in my face when you see me!! its your choice to have a kid not mine. i should of been writing my cv today i did a rough draft of my resignation letter as well but neither has gone anywhere. today i spent looking at dogs. every half a year i torture myself!!! i live at home with my mum and my bros gonna be moving back in january and shes made it perfectly clear she doesnt want a dog. i fucking do and seeing as i dont talk to or get on with my mum or my bro and my dad doesnt live at home its just me and i think itd be a good companion.Then theres the money side. i need to leave my job. theres vet bills and the list just keeps getting bigger i hate to admit it but in a perfect world i would like to move out and get an apprenticeship wherever it would take me, get a dog and hope that ill have a perfect little family scenario when a bloke comes along and everythings all sunshine and flowers lol. i think atm i still ahve a little too muhc going o and a lot of cynacism before i let a bloke in. but give me a break iv already had one big change this week and gave up smoking i cant do too much too soon lol Blog yes i dont understand why everything has to be revolved around being in a relationship.

renting/buying a flat/house
adopting/rescueing animals
the first conversation when you see someone after a long time.

Im sorry but for me a relationship is not the be all and end all of life!! i have a ton of other things i want to be doing. i dont like kids i dont get all gooey when i see them so stop throwing your baby in my face when you see me!! its your choice to have a kid not mine.

i should of been writing my cv today i did a rough draft of my resignation letter as well but neither has gone anywhere. today i spent looking at dogs.

every half a year i torture myself!!!

i live at home with my mum and my bros gonna be moving back in january

and shes made it perfectly clear she doesnt want a dog. i fucking do and seeing as i dont talk to or get on with my mum or my bro and my dad doesnt live at home its just me and i think itd be a good companion.Then theres the money side. i need to leave my job. theres vet bills

and the list just keeps getting bigger

i hate to admit it but in a perfect world i would like to move out and get an apprenticeship wherever it would take me, get a dog and hope that ill have a perfect little family scenario when a bloke comes along and everythings all sunshine and flowers lol.

i think atm i still ahve a little too muhc going o and a lot of cynacism before i let a bloke in. but give me a break iv already had one big change this week and gave up smoking i cant do too much too soon lol
]]> Sakura Blog http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/81541/#comments 31 http://rss.deviantnation.com/comments/journal/81541 http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/81541 Fri, 07 Nov 2008 16:37:47 GMT po0 http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/81047 [Deviant Nation] Sakura's Journal po0 Sakura What does it mean when an ex boyfriend who your on and off with and trying to be on comes by work and for the first time ever he brings you a bunch of lillies.......that never open???/ this happened about a year ago but my boss bought in lillies the other day to work and it reminded me. maybe its a sign. tells you that he obviously wasnt the one. i read the book and i had my last fag yesterday afternoon. i ahve thought it and the thought has passed. so im glad to say its working the real test is when i see my ex. all i have to do now is get some balls to leave work and try and sort my life out. my face is a mess i have red scarring on my lip where my piercings have come out, its cold so the broken veins on my nose are bright red and im tired as hell.  a continuing theme for the last week. to top it off tonight is halloween and i dont have anything to do xx Blog yes What does it mean when an ex boyfriend who your on and off with and trying to be on comes by work and for the first time ever he brings you a bunch of lillies.......that never open???/

this happened about a year ago but my boss bought in lillies the other day to work and it reminded me.

maybe its a sign. tells you that he obviously wasnt the one.

i read the book and i had my last fag yesterday afternoon. i ahve thought it and the thought has passed. so im glad to say its working the real test is when i see my ex.

all i have to do now is get some balls to leave work and try and sort my life out.

my face is a mess i have red scarring on my lip where my piercings have come out, its cold so the broken veins on my nose are bright red and im tired as hell. a continuing theme for the last week.

to top it off tonight is halloween and i dont have anything to do

xx
]]> Sakura Blog http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/81047/#comments 13 http://rss.deviantnation.com/comments/journal/81047 http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/81047 Fri, 31 Oct 2008 13:57:44 GMT sxe scratcher http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/80813 [Deviant Nation] Sakura's Journal sxe scratcher Sakura So the ebay addiction went a bit crazy and yesterday i managed to purchase a tattoo mahcine, foot pedal, chords ink and a power pack. some guy was selling off his kit and what luck i managed to catch it in time. its probably not going to be of much good but its a start and im so tired of sitting down and watching all the shit drawers get apprenticeships. To hell with it!!!!!!!!!!! i should get those beggining of next month damn echeques. Sometimes i can be a shit. i let depression get the better of me. this is the depression the nhs shrink told me i didnt have and i was just "unhappy" the same one that when i decided to get down at work and break down in tears out the back it was also the same day a friend was picking me up to go to the cinema. i was such a moody cunt i felt like i had used him in the end and i felt rotten. i sent him a text and apologised proffusly. last night i get a text from him asking if im still awake and he comes round with gifts to cheer me up!!! i mean wtf have i dont to deserve this. he got me aplanet terror on dvd because i didnt get round to watch the one he lent me. a tattoo book in which also has rubyriot in. and alan carrs how to quit smoking because i asked to borrow his. these were all brand new!!!!!!!!!!! So today im reading the book in hopes that one day ill be able to kick the awful habit. i think itll be a good change for me i only wish i could transfer this to other areas in my life xxx Blog yes So the ebay addiction went a bit crazy and yesterday i managed to purchase a tattoo mahcine, foot pedal, chords ink and a power pack. some guy was selling off his kit and what luck i managed to catch it in time. its probably not going to be of much good but its a start and im so tired of sitting down and watching all the shit drawers get apprenticeships.

To hell with it!!!!!!!!!!!

i should get those beggining of next month damn echeques.

Sometimes i can be a shit. i let depression get the better of me. this is the depression the nhs shrink told me i didnt have and i was just "unhappy" the same one that when i decided to get down at work and break down in tears out the back it was also the same day a friend was picking me up to go to the cinema.

i was such a moody cunt i felt like i had used him in the end and i felt rotten. i sent him a text and apologised proffusly. last night i get a text from him asking if im still awake and he comes round with gifts to cheer me up!!! i mean wtf have i dont to deserve this.
he got me aplanet terror on dvd because i didnt get round to watch the one he lent me. a tattoo book in which also has rubyriot in. and alan carrs how to quit smoking because i asked to borrow his. these were all brand new!!!!!!!!!!!

So today im reading the book in hopes that one day ill be able to kick the awful habit. i think itll be a good change for me i only wish i could transfer this to other areas in my life

xxx
]]> Sakura Blog http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/80813/#comments 22 http://rss.deviantnation.com/comments/journal/80813 http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/80813 Tue, 28 Oct 2008 12:30:29 GMT dear santa http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/80324 [Deviant Nation] Sakura's Journal dear santa Sakura Do you think its possible to deliberatly soul search? or does it just happen when you least expect it. can you organise a deliberate travelling experiance to soul search? and does it work? nothing happened when i went out to greece. my first time on a plane alone.second time iv ever been ona  plane and nothing. i met a traveller that said he stood in front of the acropolis and was almost brought to tears and told me to go see it on a sunny day (it was a rainy and miserable day at the time) not knowing when id be back to main town athens i went and saw it, stood in fornt of it and felt, nothing. no excitement, no grandeur of how important this building is and how long its been there. i stood on the edge of the hill and looked over and you could see the houses going out for miles up to the mountains and the mist. and still i felt nothing. im at a piont where i cant go about life being so numb anymore yet im completly stuck on getting myself motvated enough to make a change. too obviously im scared, scared of losing or actually im too scared of seeing how things really stand. if i change and ruin it all then thats it but right now at least i dont no. im thinking of college but im holding back. too scared to leave a job im in now even tho im tired of seeing so many talentless numptys getting apprenticeships, yet im scared/threatened/feel defeated if i saw someone taking over my job. i have yet to figure out how my mind works, i have yet to discover who hana is and im too fucking scared to live life and the funniest thing is im too petrified of death. im stuck in that place in the middle My friend has ordered me tickets so we can go see saw on friday on its opening day and im excited.  the only movies im too scared to watch alone hahahaha. Dear Santa, i would like for christmas Some hair nice eyebrows Skeleton hand hairgrips (for my nice new hair) The headspace to get my tongue split Derwent colouring pencils a good tattoo machine no reynards disease a year off to travel without any money or job worries Blog yes Do you think its possible to deliberatly soul search?
or does it just happen when you least expect it.
can you organise a deliberate travelling experiance to soul search? and does it work?

nothing happened when i went out to greece. my first time on a plane alone.second time iv ever been ona plane and nothing.
i met a traveller that said he stood in front of the acropolis and was almost brought to tears and told me to go see it on a sunny day (it was a rainy and miserable day at the time)

not knowing when id be back to main town athens i went and saw it, stood in fornt of it and felt, nothing.

no excitement, no grandeur of how important this building is and how long its been there. i stood on the edge of the hill and looked over and you could see the houses going out for miles up to the mountains and the mist. and still i felt nothing.

im at a piont where i cant go about life being so numb anymore yet im completly stuck on getting myself motvated enough to make a change.
too obviously im scared, scared of losing or actually im too scared of seeing how things really stand. if i change and ruin it all then thats it but right now at least i dont no.

im thinking of college but im holding back. too scared to leave a job im in now even tho im tired of seeing so many talentless numptys getting apprenticeships, yet im scared/threatened/feel defeated if i saw someone taking over my job.

i have yet to figure out how my mind works, i have yet to discover who hana is and im too fucking scared to live life and the funniest thing is im too petrified of death. im stuck in that place in the middle

My friend has ordered me tickets so we can go see saw on friday on its opening day and im excited. the only movies im too scared to watch alone hahahaha.

Dear Santa, i would like for christmas

Some hair
nice eyebrows
Skeleton hand hairgrips (for my nice new hair)
The headspace to get my tongue split
Derwent colouring pencils
a good tattoo machine
no reynards disease
a year off to travel without any money or job worries

]]> Sakura Blog http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/80324/#comments 28 http://rss.deviantnation.com/comments/journal/80324 http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/80324 Tue, 21 Oct 2008 14:55:09 GMT new painted shoes http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/80245 [Deviant Nation] Sakura's Journal new painted shoes Sakura This is what i do when im bored at work im more happier with these then my last post im seeing kittie tonight cant wai to leave work and get out of this coldness. saturday i went to thorpe park good times. no pictures couldnt be arsed but this is one fo the best rides ever oooh and go here http://shop.ebay.co.uk/merchant/sakuratattoo because i badly need to raise some cash for tattooing gear xxxxxxxxxxxx Blog yes This is what i do when im bored at work

im more happier with these then my last post

im seeing kittie tonight cant wai to leave work and get out of this coldness.

saturday i went to thorpe park good times. no pictures couldnt be arsed but this is one fo the best rides ever

oooh and go here

http://shop.ebay.co.uk/merchant/sakuratattoo

because i badly need to raise some cash for tattooing gear

xxxxxxxxxxxx ]]> Sakura Blog http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/80245/#comments 30 http://rss.deviantnation.com/comments/journal/80245 http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/80245 Mon, 20 Oct 2008 12:53:12 GMT blah blah http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/79856 [Deviant Nation] Sakura's Journal Sakura <div style="text-align: center;">for the first time in a long time i finally did some drawing that i really wanted to do. i love bold colours big outlines and keeping it simple so i modified a couple of my friends<img height="398" width="499" src="http://i.deviantnation.com/m/150081/" alt="" /> <img height="414" width="552" src="http://i.deviantnation.com/m/150082/" alt="" /> Im working on a third one of <a href="http://deviantnation.com/members/skin" class="member" rel="tag">skin</a>. im not completly happy with these they havnt worked out quite as well as i thought they would but theyll do. i gutted my bedroom once again i will post abroad http://shop.ebay.co.uk/merchant/sakuratattoo xxxxxx </div> Blog yes for the first time in a long time i finally did some drawing that i really wanted to do. i love bold colours big outlines and keeping it simple so i modified a couple of my friends

Im working on a third one of skin.

im not completly happy with these they havnt worked out quite as well as i thought they would but theyll do.

i gutted my bedroom once again
i will post abroad

http://shop.ebay.co.uk/merchant/sakuratattoo

xxxxxx

]]> Sakura Blog http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/79856/#comments 29 http://rss.deviantnation.com/comments/journal/79856 http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/79856 Tue, 14 Oct 2008 14:29:16 GMT camera whore-----how not to do your eyebrows http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/79264 [Deviant Nation] Sakura's Journal camera whore-----how not to do your eyebrows Sakura This is what happens when i get bored on a sunday afternoon with nothing to do lol.       The backwards nike tick the attempting to use a ruler on my face     the surprsied look (thats not me raising my eyebrow) the manga look while eating a sweet The goth look and the winner is..................... then i decided to take some more pictures with my dn tee fun times lol xxxx Blog yes This is what happens when i get bored on a sunday afternoon with nothing to do lol.

The backwards nike tick

the attempting to use a ruler on my face

the surprsied look (thats not me raising my eyebrow)

the manga look while eating a sweet

The goth look

and the winner is.....................

then i decided to take some more pictures with my dn tee

fun times lol

xxxx

]]> Sakura Blog http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/79264/#comments 32 http://rss.deviantnation.com/comments/journal/79264 http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/79264 Mon, 06 Oct 2008 14:20:51 GMT i have hair!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/78993 [Deviant Nation] Sakura's Journal i have hair!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Sakura iv just had the most unappetising bagel with cream cheese and herb on top. my mouth has never been so dry and i dont think iv taken so long to eat a piece a bread. bit like chewing turkey at christmas hahahah.  the room im in at work is way too cold. you want to o how i no this apart form my fingers turning yellow and num??/ every time i make a cup of tea to keep myself warm it goes cold in seconds. i no im really stereo typical but i love my tea iv arranged to go to thorpe park at the end of the month the ex is coming its constantly on and off and i just cant escape im hvaing t share a room and a double bed with him for damnation festival were going to lets hope he doesnt get a girlfriend before then because im not dealing with the grief. or maybe if he did hed be forced to buy his own fucking room.hmmmm i should probably stop making friends with my ex friends and make my own lol. i started my watercolour course the other day. interesting lol. a vase and fruit and im shit at watercolours im hoping ill learn how to paint for the 144 im paying for it lol. meanwhile im still selling a ton of my stuff. i will post worldwide http://shop.ebay.co.uk/merchant/sakuratattoo i needs to buy me a tattoo machine and got on that shit im so tired of watching a million to one scratchers doing their shit i got my Dn t shirt through the other day im going to modify it slightly and then take pictures of it. i keep meaning to make me a new myspace just a genral modelling one cos im on a few sites and dont want to promote Dn on a godsgirl one. i get so bored tho and i dont ahve the money to make a super awsome one. boooo so what do you think do i rock the blonde? or am i a bit washed out? feels so good either way to have hair again. the grass is always greener hey? http://shop.ebay.co.uk/merchant/sakuratattoo xxx Blog yes iv just had the most unappetising bagel with cream cheese and herb on top. my mouth has never been so dry and i dont think iv taken so long to eat a piece a bread. bit like chewing turkey at christmas hahahah.

the room im in at work is way too cold. you want to o how i no this apart form my fingers turning yellow and num??/ every time i make a cup of tea to keep myself warm it goes cold in seconds. i no im really stereo typical but i love my tea

iv arranged to go to thorpe park at the end of the month the ex is coming its constantly on and off and i just cant escape im hvaing t share a room and a double bed with him for damnation festival were going to lets hope he doesnt get a girlfriend before then because im not dealing with the grief. or maybe if he did hed be forced to buy his own fucking room.hmmmm i should probably stop making friends with my ex friends and make my own lol.

i started my watercolour course the other day. interesting lol. a vase and fruit and im shit at watercolours im hoping ill learn how to paint for the 144 im paying for it lol. meanwhile im still selling a ton of my stuff. i will post worldwide
http://shop.ebay.co.uk/merchant/sakuratattoo

i needs to buy me a tattoo machine and got on that shit im so tired of watching a million to one scratchers doing their shit

i got my Dn t shirt through the other day im going to modify it slightly and then take pictures of it. i keep meaning to make me a new myspace just a genral modelling one cos im on a few sites and dont want to promote Dn on a godsgirl one. i get so bored tho and i dont ahve the money to make a super awsome one. boooo

so what do you think do i rock the blonde? or am i a bit washed out?
feels so good either way to have hair again. the grass is always greener hey?

http://shop.ebay.co.uk/merchant/sakuratattoo

xxx

]]> Sakura Blog http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/78993/#comments 45 http://rss.deviantnation.com/comments/journal/78993 http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/78993 Thu, 02 Oct 2008 13:04:32 GMT iv been lost http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/78500 [Deviant Nation] Sakura's Journal iv been lost Sakura Its ok. the computer broke down and its given me a well deserved rest from the cyberworld. Its been up and down and its still going to be like this for a while. i have a hard time taking control of my life. but today i forked over the £144 for a painting and drawing course. i forgot to check what it entails as i got in a tizz but lets hope its what im after . fuck im so stupid sometimes iv been buying so much from ebay that im now selling stuff lol http://shop.ebay.co.uk/merchant/sakuratattoo I will post international i just havnt put it on the site there will be loads going up in the next week odd as me and my friend gut my bedroom Last weekend was the first brighton torture garden so me and my friends went to that. i am now without eyebrows at all im regressing back to being 16 hahahaha Those shoes are for sale!!! i have my next lasering session coming up boy am i not looking forward to it hahaha not to mention the pain itll cause my bank hahahha. xxxx Blog yes Its ok. the computer broke down and its given me a well deserved rest from the cyberworld.

Its been up and down and its still going to be like this for a while.
i have a hard time taking control of my life. but today i forked over the £144 for a painting and drawing course. i forgot to check what it entails as i got in a tizz but lets hope its what im after .

fuck im so stupid sometimes

iv been buying so much from ebay that im now selling stuff lol

http://shop.ebay.co.uk/merchant/sakuratattoo

I will post international i just havnt put it on the site there will be loads going up in the next week odd as me and my friend gut my bedroom

Last weekend was the first brighton torture garden so me and my friends went to that. i am now without eyebrows at all im regressing back to being 16 hahahaha

Those shoes are for sale!!!

i have my next lasering session coming up boy am i not looking forward to it hahaha not to mention the pain itll cause my bank hahahha.

xxxx]]> Sakura Blog http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/78500/#comments 41 http://rss.deviantnation.com/comments/journal/78500 http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/78500 Thu, 25 Sep 2008 13:24:36 GMT those latex pictures and new pics of laser sesh http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/76402 [Deviant Nation] Sakura's Journal those latex pictures and new pics of laser sesh Sakura I finally got my latex pictures back from the tog all credit goes to andy dendy here are the edited ones here are the unedited ones that i liked this is waiting for him to find the right angle and lighting. unfortunatly we never got it I also went for my second session of laser treatment. i think the black is going to be stubborn as fuck it still isnt lifting :/. i do not recomend going out clubbing the night before hand and then braving it. Im now waiting for the friday ad to come out i need to move out my mum is doing my head in now my brother has left and everything is getting taken out on me. dont care if shes hurting she should grow the fuck up and not take i out on me for leaving a few crumbs on the kitchen counter every fucking time!!!!! xx Blog yes I finally got my latex pictures back from the tog

all credit goes to andy dendy

here are the edited ones

here are the unedited ones that i liked

this is waiting for him to find the right angle and lighting. unfortunatly we never got it

I also went for my second session of laser treatment. i think the black is going to be stubborn as fuck it still isnt lifting :/.

i do not recomend going out clubbing the night before hand and then braving it.

Im now waiting for the friday ad to come out i need to move out my mum is doing my head in now my brother has left and everything is getting taken out on me. dont care if shes hurting she should grow the fuck up and not take i out on me for leaving a few crumbs on the kitchen counter every fucking time!!!!!

xx

]]> Sakura Blog http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/76402/#comments 45 http://rss.deviantnation.com/comments/journal/76402 http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/76402 Thu, 28 Aug 2008 10:46:55 GMT ok someone get me the fuck off ebay!!!!! http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/75945 [Deviant Nation] Sakura's Journal ok someone get me the fuck off ebay!!!!! Sakura Its only 2 in the afternoon over here and its killing me with boredom. for some reason my brain has turned to slush and i cant concentrate on drawing. i have a few unfinished pictures i need to concentrate on but im just sitting here staring blankly at the screen and bidding on shit on ebay!!!!! here is what iv won/bought recently black and gold and not forgetting those awsome gold leggings hahahahaha. so now we can all laugh at my appaling dress/fashion sense . im not actaully loaded with money i just dont drink or do drugs or go out as much. so even tho iv spent all of yesterday loading stuff on i seem to be buying more stuff off the place hhaha. the money i saved up to go to leeds to get my tattoo which isnt happening now i seem to be using. then i forgot i have a kittie gig i just payed for. my god do i love that band and lasering on the wednesday coming up i should really manage my money. curently im still bidding on a latex top gold bikini and gold jumper.... i truly do suck hahahahaha xx Blog yes Its only 2 in the afternoon over here and its killing me with boredom.
for some reason my brain has turned to slush and i cant concentrate on drawing. i have a few unfinished pictures i need to concentrate on but im just sitting here staring blankly at the screen and bidding on shit on ebay!!!!!

here is what iv won/bought recently

black and gold

and not forgetting those awsome gold leggings hahahahaha.

so now we can all laugh at my appaling dress/fashion sense .

im not actaully loaded with money i just dont drink or do drugs or go out as much.

so even tho iv spent all of yesterday loading stuff on i seem to be buying more stuff off the place hhaha. the money i saved up to go to leeds to get my tattoo which isnt happening now i seem to be using.

then i forgot i have a kittie gig i just payed for. my god do i love that band

and lasering on the wednesday coming up
i should really manage my money.

curently im still bidding on a latex top gold bikini and gold jumper.... i truly do suck hahahahaha

xx]]> Sakura Blog http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/75945/#comments 26 http://rss.deviantnation.com/comments/journal/75945 http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/75945 Fri, 22 Aug 2008 13:15:25 GMT ok so i no i suck http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/75911 [Deviant Nation] Sakura's Journal ok so i no i suck Sakura its currently 9.57 pm over here. normally when i leave work i dont go back on the comp cos iv already been on it for about 8 hours but tonight im up till 1 to see if i win on ebay. i spent the whole 8 hours at work today trying to sell my stuff on there and putting it all up. thats not good and theres still more to go. i was just having one of those few weeks were i was looking in the wardrobes and thinking i dont think i can get away with that stuff anymore. i was putting on outfits and feeling weird and childish in them when i was out. luckily the gold leggings are here to stay hahaha Last night i saw soulfly  frigging awsome the venue they played in was uber small and i was so close to max cavalera. which makes me think of reading this weekend  i couldnt afford to go and rage are doing their first gig in the uk over here im so upset its untrue anyway.....this gigin a nutshell i was a row behind the barrier, one girl fainted on me and she werent skinny and i definatly dont have muscles so as well as trying to hold my bag and oat in one hand i was lifting her up under her armpits and had my knee in her back so she didnt crash to the floor. luckliy my mate rescued me him with the muscles n'all and all the while her white fro skinny emo boyfriend just watched like an idiot. nice. then another girl was spitting in this guys face over me while he was windmilling around and trying to create a two man pit on the side were people just stand and watch. sorry mate but if you want to pit you join the big lads in the middle and get annhiliated like the rest of us. i on the other hand have way too many piercings however everyone waited in anticipation for this one song. the song of all songs, the anthem of everything that is soulfy and sepultura and did it come............ dit it bollocks!!!!! cavalieira conspiracy played it, (i missed it tho at download due to sunstrokeness) so why not now!!!!!! there wasnt even a whiff of an encore!!!!!!! omg so my gifts from hannya finally arrived wahoo i got so much cool stuff mainly hello kitty which is awsome but my favourite has to be the daruma!!!!!!! i love it so much and the aastro boys pens and espeically the hand drawn spongebob i have to apologise for the lack of me participatuing as much on here atm. its hard to describe but i get quite lethargic when im on here and i dont tend to do much so i apologise if it takes me a while to reply. xxx Blog yes
its currently 9.57 pm over here. normally when i leave work i dont go back on the comp cos iv already been on it for about 8 hours but tonight im up till 1 to see if i win on ebay.

i spent the whole 8 hours at work today trying to sell my stuff on there and putting it all up. thats not good and theres still more to go.

i was just having one of those few weeks were i was looking in the wardrobes and thinking i dont think i can get away with that stuff anymore. i was putting on outfits and feeling weird and childish in them when i was out. luckily the gold leggings are here to stay hahaha

Last night i saw soulfly frigging awsome the venue they played in was uber small and i was so close to max cavalera. which makes me think of reading this weekend i couldnt afford to go and rage are doing their first gig in the uk over here im so upset its untrue

anyway.....this gigin a nutshell i was a row behind the barrier, one girl fainted on me and she werent skinny and i definatly dont have muscles so as well as trying to hold my bag and oat in one hand i was lifting her up under her armpits and had my knee in her back so she didnt crash to the floor. luckliy my mate rescued me him with the muscles n'all and all the while her white fro skinny emo boyfriend just watched like an idiot. nice.

then another girl was spitting in this guys face over me while he was windmilling around and trying to create a two man pit on the side were people just stand and watch.

sorry mate but if you want to pit you join the big lads in the middle and get annhiliated like the rest of us. i on the other hand have way too many piercings

however everyone waited in anticipation for this one song. the song of all songs, the anthem of everything that is soulfy and sepultura and did it come............

dit it bollocks!!!!!

cavalieira conspiracy played it, (i missed it tho at download due to sunstrokeness) so why not now!!!!!!

there wasnt even a whiff of an encore!!!!!!!

omg so my gifts from hannya finally arrived wahoo

i got so much cool stuff mainly hello kitty which is awsome but my favourite has to be the daruma!!!!!!! i love it so much and the aastro boys pens and espeically the hand drawn spongebob

i have to apologise for the lack of me participatuing as much on here atm. its hard to describe but i get quite lethargic when im on here and i dont tend to do much so i apologise if it takes me a while to reply.

xxx]]> Sakura Blog http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/75911/#comments 5 http://rss.deviantnation.com/comments/journal/75911 http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/75911 Thu, 21 Aug 2008 21:10:45 GMT saturday night out bombarment of pictures. yet again!!!!! http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/75655 [Deviant Nation] Sakura's Journal Sakura <div style="text-align: center;">iv been buying things off ebay. it annoys me when i have to pay by cheque cos theres not enough in my paypal account at the time. im waiting for these bad boys. <img width="400" height="300" src="http://i.deviantnation.com/m/141463/" alt="" /> im quite worried about what condition there going to turn up in cos shes used this same image for four different pair of roller boots all in diff sizes <img width="32" height="35" src="http://i.deviantnation.com/i/emoticons/fire_head.gif" contenteditable="false" alt="" /> and i got these which are just the sex. there gold!! hahaha <img width="400" height="300" src="http://i.deviantnation.com/m/141464/" alt="" /> i am known for my officially bad taste i went out for the first time in ages last night. it was interesting fun the guys managed to persuade me to stay out after the last train had left and im really uncomfortable sleeping round someone elses house so we ended up going to catch the early morning train which  we thought was at 5 but was actually 5.44 so we got a taxi hahaha im still paying for it now! <img width="347" height="260" src="http://i.deviantnation.com/m/141465/" alt="" /> you gotta love the english teeth ahahaha <img width="401" height="535" src="http://i.deviantnation.com/m/141466/" alt="" /><img width="387" height="514" src="http://i.deviantnation.com/m/141467/" alt="" /><img width="360" height="270" src="http://i.deviantnation.com/m/141468/" alt="" /> <img width="380" height="505" src="http://i.deviantnation.com/m/141469/" alt="" /> me and my bro charlie i love this guy <img width="416" height="312" src="http://i.deviantnation.com/m/141470/" alt="" /> none of these pictures look good hahaha and i wasnt even trollied</div> Blog yes iv been buying things off ebay. it annoys me when i have to pay by cheque cos theres not enough in my paypal account at the time.
im waiting for these bad boys.

im quite worried about what condition there going to turn up in cos shes used this same image for four different pair of roller boots all in diff sizes
and i got these which are just the sex. there gold!! hahaha

i am known for my officially bad taste

i went out for the first time in ages last night. it was interesting fun the guys managed to persuade me to stay out after the last train had left and im really uncomfortable sleeping round someone elses house so we ended up going to catch the early morning train which we thought was at 5 but was actually 5.44 so we got a taxi hahaha im still paying for it now!

you gotta love the english teeth ahahaha

me and my bro charlie i love this guy

none of these pictures look good hahaha and i wasnt even trollied]]> Sakura Blog http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/75655/#comments 27 http://rss.deviantnation.com/comments/journal/75655 http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/75655 Mon, 18 Aug 2008 12:24:48 GMT here i go again on my own................. http://deviantnation.com/members/Sakura/75226 [Deviant Nation] Sakura's Journal Sakura <div style="text-align: center;">So garys dead <img width="33" height="29" alt="" contenteditable="false" src="http://i.deviantnation.com/i/emoticons/death.gif" /> no more snail i found flys in there having sex on the cucumber. thats not a good sign, but glad to no somethings getting laid. everything but me. iv been feeling a bit weird lately, i joined another site an i was so excited, but i realised im not like some of the people on there and added with that the big talk i ended up having with a work collegue about my attitude and how im not being responsive enough at work its making me realise that when the councellor says iv got too many eggs in my basket and when my friend compares me to a wild kite. i think i might finally actually get what there on about. im not quite sure what to do anymore. i get the feeling i should be focusing on one thing rather then a thousand things at once. im trying to meet people but im not meeting the right ones, maybe im looking in the wrong places<img alt="" contenteditable="false" src="http://i.deviantnation.com/images/emoticons/confused.gif" /> i dont have any me time. i looked in my diary the other day and found that on my days off im actually booked up through to mid september!!! not one of my days is me just doing nothing!! this isnt healthy anymore and im tired of being a lonely old shit thinking about the past and things i miss and im having trouble trying to find a way to get through it all. yesterday the ex finally broke the strings that tied us together and has been ignoring me. i wont have to hear anymore of his bullshit i love you's and the countless sorry's he comes out with everytime he does something wrong only to keep repeating this pattern. so now i can add him to the list of people i have to get over and watch move on as i sit in my rut. great times!!!! i hate this part i have a photoshoot with <a rel="tag" class="member" href="http://deviantnation.com/members/studioamyallen">studioamyallen</a> this wed and im looking forward to it. it might be rainy it will certaintly be cold sitting on the beach in the sailors outfit hahaha hopefully itll be good enough to send ino you guys i did another sitting on my friend with the anchors got one fully outlined <img width="484" height="363" alt="" src="http://i.deviantnation.com/m/140778/" /> <img width="305" height="407" alt="" src="http://i.deviantnation.com/m/140779/" /> i did some retail the other day and bought these shoes/sneakers/dunks hahaha. now all i need is a grey bandana to go with it. no really! <img width="400" height="266" alt="" src="http://i.deviantnation.com/m/140781/" /> And i leave you with some more pictures i got from the wales tattoo <img width="640" height="480" alt="" src="http://i.deviantnation.com/m/140783/" /> <img width="427" height="320" alt="" src="http://i.deviantnation.com/m/140784/" /><img width="579" height="434" alt="" src="http://i.deviantnation.com/m/140785/" /><img width="640" height="480" alt="" src="http://i.deviantnation.com/m/140786/" /><img width="640" height="480" alt="" src="http://i.deviantnation.com/m/140788/" /><img width="468" height="351" alt="" src="http://i.deviantnation.com/m/140789/" /><img width="423" height="317" alt="" src="http://i.deviantnation.com/m/140790/" /><img width="431" height="323" alt="" src="http://i.deviantnation.com/m/140791/" /> 10 things you wish you could say to ten different people right now: - i wish you you lived in my country -i cant figure out why i am the way i am i just wished you bloody talked to me im sorry. we both destroyed each other and i have no idea whats good for me right now -dont pretend like were bother sister in front of other people just to make you look good. im still waiting for an apology - im tired of doing all the chasing for your friendship -dont use me for tattoos -im not like you guys i never will be. in trying to find myself i got caught up in the fake facade that was made. -im not sure if id ever want to see you. im sorry its just a weird situation -please do me a tattoo im in awe of your work -im scared of you dying. sorry i dont see you enough its not that i dont care. i love you -please stop walking past and making those face at me and tuttering you look like an old leather faced witch and your extremely rude 9 things about yourself: -i chew the inside of my mouth - i have reynards disease but despite that i still continue to smoke because it smy last vice - i collect shoes! i love shoes - im in love with tattooing but still have a loooong way to go - i sleep for the reccomended time but i still get bags and feeltired all the time - im bitter and dont believe in love -im searching for the movie love/ im a walking contradiction -i want full body tattoo coverage - i dig fat guys 8 ways to win your heart: -be an old romantic -do something a little outside the box -be yourself with no smutt or ineundo and no trying to impress me with shit -kiss me when you want to not because its part of foreplay - holding hands -surprising me with gifts and notes and random shit and liking it when i do it back lol - leaving me tx for the morning -making me laugh 7 awesome movies: -the secutary -nightmare before christmas -love actually -men behind the sun -waynes world - the goonies -fear and loathing 6 things you do before you fall asleep: - brush teeth - get in bed clothes -watch tv - set alarm -last minute tx -masturbate 5 people who mean a lot: -tyra -kaylee -faye - <a href="http://deviantnation.com/members/hannya" class="member" rel="tag">hannya </a> - family 4 things you're wearing right now: - plaid trousers - tattoo fx t shirt - bra - converse with hand painted hannya mask on 3 songs that you listen to often (currently): -hatebreeder children of bodom -something else by children of bodom -dodgy 80's shit 2 things you want to do before you die: - bungee jump -found a happiness and learnt to love again 1 confession: - everyone pretty much knows how shit i am xx<img width="10" height="20" alt="" contenteditable="false" src="http://i.deviantnation.com/i/emoticons/robot2.gif" /> </div> Blog yes